Crime and Punishment
27 Jul 2005
just before lunchtime
Matt Winckler
Last night I was driving to run an errand and heard this sickening story on NPR’s All Things Considered. I could hardly believe it–but judge for yourself.
The story was about the increasing number of elderly inmates in U.S. prisons. NPR focused on the Minnesota’s oldest female prisoner, the 91-year-old Lucille Keppen. Three years ago she shot and wounded a 64-year-old man caring for her and was subsequently sentenced to 7 years in prison.
Stephen Flesche had been ministering to Keppen, cooking for her, tending to her needs, taking her shopping, driving her places, and performing various other duties after she underwent heart surgery. In return, Keppen paid for many of Flesche’s needs such as clothing. Keppen was extremely jealous of Flesche, particularly when he befriended other women or received gifts from others. Eventually the relationship deteriorated to the point that one Sunday after church, Keppen came home, ate lunch, prepared donuts and coffee for the seniors’ church service that afternoon, then took out one of her deceased husband’s guns and loaded it.
I said to myself, if he’s just halfway decent to me, just halfway decent, I’ll take it upstairs. Well, when he came down, so arrogant, and he looks at me and he goes “Good evening,” and I thought, “That’s it.” And he turned around so fast, that I caught him in the back.
Keppen shot Flesche in the back, the .38 caliber bullet lodging in his lung. As he was standing there in disbelief, Keppen berated him. She recounts:
And I said to him, does it hurt? And I said, “I really want it to hurt. Because you’ve hurt me so deeply, and I was so good to you.” I said, “Do you realize every stitch of clothing that you have on your body–your glasses, your watch, your ring,” I said “I’ve even paid for your haircuts.”
After Flesche passed out and collapsed, bleeding profusely, Keppen called for an ambulance. Flesche survived. Keppen was convicted of first- and second-degree assault and sentenced with up to 7 years in prison. She now bemoans losing “everything”–savings, friends, freedom. But she does admit the prison she’s in is in many ways superior to the senior public housing she had been living in before. (Now there’s a mistake that needs to be rectified…one way or another.)
The NPR report commented that courts in recent years have grown less willing to show leniency because of age, and this has resulted in an explosion of elderly inmates. I ask the question: how on earth is this a bad thing? It absolutely does not matter whether you are 8 or 88–you should be held responsible for your crime.
The really sickening part of all this is at the end of the report, where Keppen demonstrates she is not particularly sorry for the shooting. “I made one mistake at 88…it should have been reversed. He should have been here, and I should have been out.” Keppen also says that “Martha Stewart was allowed to be released and wear an electronic bracelet…If I had her money, I probably would have been released.”
Well, possibly. There is also the little matter that you shot a man in the back, which I think is an experience Martha somehow missed out on. What I cannot figure out is how sympathy ever enters into this equation. If you listen to the NPR story, it’s clear that they are coming down on Keppen’s side and think we should go back to being lenient to the elderly.
I have absolutely no sympathy for Keppen whatsoever. I hope she serves her full seven years–the stories I read imply that she only stopped short of saying “and if I had the opportunity to do things over, I’d do exactly the same thing again”.
Sources: NPR, St. Paul Pioneer Press.

Ugh.
Of course, this story is ammunition for the gun-control lobby, as I’m sure you’re aware.
Gun control nothing! If this crazy old lady is representative of her class, I want to propose automobile control, kitchen knife control, can opener control, frying pan control, and television remote control!
That is just whacked.
Need crazy old lady control!
As the bumper sticker says:
- Want Gun Control?
– Use Two Hands
The point, of course, is that she would have had a much more difficult time doing any sort of serious injury to him if she didn’t have a gun.
The point, of course, is that most elderly ladies aren’t criminally insane, and to make rules based on exceptions is foolish and counterproductive. This was exactly the sort of thing your previous arguments don’t apply to: premeditated actions. This was no crime of passion.