card collection
A few weeks ago, I was trying to think of some sort of special thing for Hans with his memory work. He had started the habit of saying, “No, thank you” when asked if he wanted to work on it. I didn’t want to force it or make it a big deal, but I wanted him to be encouraged in his good work. I also did not want it to become a bargaining tool for gaining candy or ice cream whenever he wanted it.
We had recently purchased a box of 1000 small stickers at the dollar store, and it was another dilemma of mine. Hans likes stickers, but does he get them whenever he draws? Then he doesn’t draw, he just sticks stickers all over his paper at random. Or he gets his stickers and puts them on things other than paper and I have to get sticky goo off of things. It seemed that he needed some specific place for stickers to go.
Then an idea came. A mediocre idea, I thought, but one that might solve both problems. I wrote with markers on an index card: Johannes Kristian. Then I drew squares about the size of the stickers around the card. I put it on the fridge. In the morning, Hans saw it and saw that it had his name on it. “Oh!” he exclaimed, “Can I draw on it?” With that question the idea developed further, “Well, Hans,” I explained, “whenever you say your catechism or Psalm 1, you can put a sticker on a square. When you fill up all the squares, you can draw on the back of the card.” I felt like it was a pretty anticlimactic finish: no candy, no special treat, you get to draw on the back of an index card. Woo. But Hans liked the idea and promptly recited Psalm 1 and put a sticker on it. Then he asked to do his catechism. Then he asked what else he could do. In about a week he had filled his first card and drew on the back with relish.
Then came the next development. “Now I’ll make you another one, Hans, and you have two cards on the fridge! Every time you fill one up, you get a new card. We can fill up this fridge with cards that say ‘Johannes Kristian.’”
Without further ado, Hans’ cards:
Currently, he can earn 5 stickers at a time if he gets into it, by repeating several times diligently and cheerfully his new questions and verses (one sticker for all new work, currently 3 questions and Ephesians 4:32), catechism questions 1-16, Psalm 1, Ephesians 6:1, and Philippians 2:14. There’s certainly a balance to be had between giving adequate reward and debasing the reward. I think I will continue to let him cumulatively earn stickers, but I will add a few more squares per card as he earns more per recitation. Generally we only do it once a day, also.
The cards also help as a visual reminder for us both to do the memory work with more frequency. Often Hans will see the cards, want to put stickers on them, and so ask to do his memory work. Sometimes I spot it while working on dinner and ask Hans if he’d like to say Psalm 1. I can listen and prompt while cooking or doing dishes. Overall, it’s worked out pretty well. It’s a cheap, easy happy for Hans that says “good work” without being over the top or making it into too big a deal.
