Ready for Routine
Friday 
in the early morning 
Mystie
Since moving, which time also involved morning sickness, we not only have not done anything remotely like circle time — now morning time — we also have not had any sort of routine, either. This has been not such a great time. We all need routine around here. It helps me cope with the day better when I’m not aimlessly wandering and it helps the boys to know what they should be doing and what is expected of them. Somehow, when the routine falls apart, all sorts of other things seemingly unrelated fall apart too. The boys are cranky for no apparent reason. Actually, perhaps it’s because I’m cranky for no apparent reason. The boys lose all their manners and suddenly forget all the rules that were once routine as well — chewing with their mouths closed, asking to be excused before leaving the table, not taking toys away or hitting one another with toys, not grabbing anything they feel like that happens to be in reach.
Well, ok, so no routine actually really affects me and my ability to manage and cope with everyday life. Since it affects my mood and stress level, it therefore affects the boys’ mood and behavior. It is the difference between humming along in a routine, knowing what needs to be done and cheerfully doing it and wallowing in “well, I could be doing all sorts of things but I think I’ll just lay here…and…do…nothing” that makes the difference to everybody. For some reason, I can take discipline in stride and also suavely guide their behavior so there’s less one-on-one, in-the-bedroom discipline when I know what to expect of a day, when I have goals, and when I’m actively working on those goals. When it’s an unstructured day and I have no goals and no point, then my temper is short and it’s as if my brain just switches off when conflict arises. I think it’s a little safety fuse. Instead of blowing up and being angry, I simply shut off and can’t cope and am at a total loss, but am still in completely the wrong frame of mind for discipline of any sort. There’s been a lot of that happening lately. Yes, it’s primarily because of the first trimester. But hormones aren’t a valid excuse for sin.
Now, of course, I don’t think being without routine is sinful. That’s ridiculous. However, I am more prone to fall into sin when I am living without routine. A good routine serves as a path that keeps me where I want to be and reminds me of the habits I want to be cultivating — in myself and in my boys. A routine makes the things that must happen in the day fall into place and leaves my brain free to function and handle things beyond the mundane.
I’ve been easing into our routine this time around. I had one for the last year that worked out pretty well, so I tweaked it for our new house and situation and have begun to work primarily on keeping the daily portion of it going. I’m at about 75% of the non-school list, and maybe getting to 25% of the weekly list. I’m happy so far. I’ve spent the last three weeks reacquainting myself with my list and my routine and giving myself leeway rather than trying to go from nothing to the full meal deal. However, my goal when I began was to start the full meal deal, including the school routines, next week. I’m ready for it. I’ve given myself a taste of life on routine and now I know that’s what I was missing.
Of course, I’ve also felt the first trimester slowly drifting away. I still get morning sickness symptoms, but less of them, and — most importantly — I am no longer constantly fatigued. That is really why I was waiting to attempt the full routine; I would be setting myself up for failure if I tried it all while in the thralls of first trimester ickiness. I know that “second trimester energy boost” is actually not more energy than you normally have, but simply that the sudden lack of constant fatigue feels relatively like an energy boost. Yet I say, even so, bring it on. :)
(MCL)
with 
(personal library)
